it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
Randomize
