Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Randomize
