Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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