Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
Randomize
