I never want to see another naked old woman again.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
