I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
