I'm sorry my penis didn't work
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
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