are you so shy because you have an std?
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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