My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
should my penis look like a turkey
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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