hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize
