Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
