Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
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