Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
