I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
You just made me feel so damn special
I'm lost and stupid without you.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
Randomize
