Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
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