There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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