Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
Randomize
