You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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