Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Randomize
