Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
I have tasted many bathrooms
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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