We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
We talked him into tasing himself.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
Randomize
