Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
