last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
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