So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Randomize
