Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
