Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
