how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Randomize
