i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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