It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
