Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Randomize
