I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
