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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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