I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
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