dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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