its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize
