the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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