This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
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