They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
operation have a gay friend backfired
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Randomize
