Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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