But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Randomize
