dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
Randomize
