ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
