On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
