if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Randomize
