All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
