you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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