after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
