So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
