We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
