Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
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